my phone conversation...

To the best of my recollection, this is a phone conversation that I had yesterday...

me:  Hello

her:  Hello (she sounded as though I had woken her up, except that she called me)

me:  Yes.  Hello.

her:  I need help with my dog.

me:  OK, yes, ma'am.  What do you need?

her:  help with my dog.

me:  OK, ma'am.  What kind of help?  What are you looking for?

her:  Well, you're the professional.  Don't you know what you do?

me:  Yes, ma'am, but I don't know what it is that you are wanting.  What you are looking for.

her:  Well, what do you do!?  (she was now raising her voice and getting agitated with me)

me:  I can come over and feed and water your dog.  I can take your dog for a walk.  I can take your dog out to potty.

her:  Well I can do all of those things...

me:  (banging head on countertop)  OK, ma'am.  Then what was it you wanted?

her:  help with my dog.  (back to this one.....)

me:  Ma'am, I am not understanding what it is you want.

her:  I was hoping you could  give my dog some tender loving care.

me:  I don't do this because I don't love animals.  I do this because I do love animals.  Your dog would be getting tender loving care with everything that I do.

her:  He had surgery and he is wearing a cone.  He doesn't like his cone.

me:  Oh, I do understand that.  They usually don't like those things.

her:  I'm so tired.

me:  Ma'am, if you would like, I could come take care of your dog.  Check on him.  See how he is doing.  I charge $15 an hour, but in that hour, I would make sure your dog was doing good.  I would feed him and give him water if he needs it.  I could take him to potty, take him for a short walk.  I would do all those things in that hour.

her:  But then you would leave.  What good would it be for me if you just left after an hour?

me:  Ma'am, I do have other clients and other things that I need to get done.  Now I could come back again later in the day and check on him again, but then that would cost you another $15 per hour.

her:  Yes, I understand.  I would really like to take off his cone and have someone sit and watch him so that he doesn't hurt himself without his cone.

me:  I can do that, ma'am, but again, that would still cost you $15 per hour.

her:  that will add up.

me:  Yes, it will.  That's why I could just come and check on him once or twice a day if you would like.

her:  I think I need to call my vet and see what he needs.

me:  Would you like me to come over and check on him now or would you like to call your vet and then perhaps call me back?

her:  I better call my vet.

me:  Yes, ma'am, I think you should call your vet first too.  I'll look forward to hearing back from you.

her:  OK.  ok.