Pops

 With the election being so close and all the TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP signs everywhere, last night I was discussing what it must be like to have the entire world know your name.  For people to hold boat parades for YOU.  For people to rush in by the thousands to hear you speak at a rally.  I decided I honestly did not want any of that for myself, but did kind of want to know how it must feel.  

Tonight the world lost a man who was the polar opposite of that.  He lived his entire adult life in his home next door to the house where he grew up in the country set between two small towns.  He married young, and he married the love of his life.  He was a man of few words, but because of this, when he did speak, people listened.  He was quiet.  He was humble.  He was moral. The people in the small towns near him knew him, but most likely no one any farther out.  He didn't care.  He didn't need to be known.  Or even want it.  He just wanted to live his simple, peaceful life with his wife and family.

They say the only thing you truly leave behind is your family.  That's your legacy.  And if his family is his legacy, well, he did pretty good.

He raised two sons who loved him with everything they had.  Neither son moved too far off, because they loved living close by and sharing their lives with their Pops.  He helped raise four grandchildren who have the utmost love and respect for their Pops.  Even as adults they often stopped by to visit and spend time with him.  

He was a simple man.  But more of us should take note from him and work to simplify our own lives.  He didn't want nor need drama and angst.  To be around him was to find contentment and peace.

Granny ... part 2

 Had a friend check in on me yesterday, and she asked me to share these three things about Granny.

What was your first meeting like? What was your favorite memory of her in general? What was the most important thing you learned from her?

........

Labor Day weekend 1981 I ran into this really cute boy at a dance in Shelby.  I had met him earlier in the summer at Silver Wings, but then didn't see him again until Labor Day.  He invited me to come to the New Ulm Fireman's Feast two weeks later.  Ok.  Now I had no idea if this was a casual date or him just being nice.  I didn't know.  So I grabbed my best friend and off we went to the feast.  He was nowhere in sight, but he had told me he would be working and would probably be late.  So I waited.  My friend and I knew no one else and it was about 170 degrees in the shade, and I was nervous.  So I drank a cold beer.  And another.  And another.  And... where you see where this is going.  That cute boy shows up just in time for the dancing to start.  He says his parents are the ones taking tickets at the door.  So yeah, after sitting in the scorching sun all day sweating and pouring cold beers down my throat one after another, I get to meet Granny and Pops for the first time.  I barely remember it, so I am sure I made quite the impression on them.  Especially considering Granny never drank alcohol in her life, save communion wine.  I do not know why our memories work the way they do, because, while I do not remember at all what Pops was wearing, I remember Granny was wearing a purple pant suit.  Not sure why I remember that, but I do.

Questions 2 & 3 go together... because my favorite memory of Granny in general is just Granny being a Granny and watching her with her grandchildren.  If you look at the pictures Jenni and Audrey posted of Granny holding her great grandbabies, she is not posing for the camera.  She is not looking down to avoid the camera.  She is not paying any attention to the camera.  She is absolutely, with everything in her, taking in those babies.  

Granny knew that more than anything else in this world people are what is important and giving them your undivided attention and taking them in completely and caring about them was how to do that.

Granny was born in Mississippi, and came to Texas when she was a young girl.  As much as she grew to love Texas, she was always proud to tell people she was from Mississippi.  

She was not always welcomed when she first arrived.  You see, she was "oil field trash".  Back in the day. New Ulm was a happening place and had a hotel near the railroad.  Needless to say, the hotel had prostitutes.  Geroldine said her daddy would not allow her to play with the children of the prostitutes, because... well, their mothers were prostitutes.  Granny said that wasn't a problem, because the prostitutes would not allow their children to play with her either... because she was oil field trash.

Another lesson to learn from Granny:  she never pretended to be something she was not.  That woman was PROUD to tell you she was oil field trash, and you either accepted her or you didn't, but she always stood by who she was.

Then one day Pops saw her.  And the rest is history.  From the minute he saw her, it was destined to be. And it was ... for almost 67 years.  And as much of a love story as that sounds, it was not always easy.  A handsome young German/Czech Lutheran from a small town in Texas marrying this Heinz-57 mixed blooded Southern Baptist from Mississippi.  Yeah. Not everyone welcomed their union with open arms.  But again, almost 67 years, so those that weren't so welcoming were wrong.  Granny and Pops were meant to be.  

Another lesson to learn:  EVERYTHING that man did was for his wife.  And EVERYTHING that woman did was for her husband.

Anyway... a couple more things Jenni and I were discussing.

NO ONE knocked on Granny's door.  I don't think that door has been knocked on in 50 years, if ever.  Now I don't need or want my closest friends or family to knock on my door.  Of course they are welcomed to just come on in, but if the man down the street stops by with a package that was delivered to the wrong address, I do expect him to knock.  Not Granny.  Nobody knocked.  I remember sitting outside one time, probably watching the kids on the swing set.  A salesman comes by, and asks to talk with the lady of the house.  I tell him she is inside and to go on in.  He starts to knock.  "No. No.", I tell him. "Just go on in."  He looks at me funny and informs me he can't "just go on in".  No.  Really.  Don't knock.  Just go on in.  It's ok. This poor man is so confused now.  He WANTS to knock, but I won't let him.  He knows he SHOULD knock, but I won't let him.  He slowly opens the door.  He slowly sticks his head in.  He slowly explains himself.  Imagine his surprise when, not only is he welcomed in, but he's invited to stay and get a bite to eat.  That was Granny.

If you are still with me, I am almost done, but Jenni and I also discussed how Granny loved "tacky" things.  And I mean that in the best way possible.  I mean it in the way Dolly Parton loves "tacky".  For Granny less was never more.  If more was good, more was better.  More tinsel on that tree.  More lights.  Make it sparkle!  Make it shine!  She could not get enough gold, ornate or pink...and if she could get it all, the better!!

I often say Granny's one big fault was loving her family too much.  And we should all be so lucky to have that as our one big fault.  Granny worried over her family.  Sometimes to the point of driving us crazy.  We'd get the flu, and the first thing we'd tell each other is, "Don't tell Granny!"  We knew that if Granny knew we were sick, she would hover over us and not let up.  Now oftentimes when you're sick, you just want to be left alone...hence, why we would not tell Granny.  But there are other times when you feel bad and you WANT to be hovered over and taken care of.  I promise you, if my kids were sick, they wanted Granny, not me.  That does not hurt my feelings, because when I wanted someone to take care of me, I wanted Granny too.  I get it.  

That woman was truly special.  She didn't ask for much... except love.  She never ever tried to buy her kids or grandkids love.  She didn't buy expensive toys or gadgets... she gave of herself and her time.  Her attention and her love.  With Granny you got Granny, but that was always enough.

Granny

 The world lost a wonderful and special woman today.

I promise they don't make them like her anymore.

As we all strive to be Proverbs 31 women, this lady WAS it.

Everything I learned about raising babies, children and teenagers, I owe to this woman.

She was the baby whisperer.  She could soothe any baby, calm any toddler and reason with any teenager.

She raised her siblings.  She raised her boys.  She raised her grandkids.  She loved on her great grandkids.

Her God, her husband, her family and her home were everything to her.  

She was absolutely one of the most selfless people on the face of this earth.

She was my mother-in-law for 27 years.  I loved her dearly, but I will admit at times I did not cherish her as much as I should have.  At times, I definitely took her and her love for granted.  

I am beyond sad, but I will be ok.

Please do not worry about me.... instead pray for her husband of 67 years.  Pray for her sons.  Pray for her daughters-in-law, pray for her grandchildren, pray for her great grandchildren and pray for her siblings.  They will all be ok.  They KNOW she is now in the arms of her Savior, but they are hurting.  Please pray for them.

James

 

On Mondays I get to pick James up from school.  When it is not soccer season,  I also get Ila. But for now, it is just James.

For all my postings and photos on social media, believe it or not, there are times when my phone is not the most important thing in my life and not even being thought about.  I am going to share two stories about James, and neither story has any photos to go with them.  At the time, in the moment, I was simply enjoying James. Feel free to enjoy the above photo though.

A week or two ago, the Monday was wearing down.  It was closing in on bedtime.  James had already had his bath and was on the couch watching tv before bed.  Now picture it, because there are precious few things cuter than a clean toddler with a wet head all snug in their jammies. Add to this his daddy's boots, keeping in mind his daddy has HUGE boots.  James is up against the back of the couch, legs extended.  He has on Dustin's boots which pretty much take up little James' entire lower body.  He is also wearing his swimming goggles over his eyes and a zebra mask he colored at school over the goggles.  We are watching "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse: Superheroes".  Mortimer Mouse has shrunk all the places in Mickey Mouse land, placed them into balls and then made a collection out of all the balls.  Why?  Because HE WANTS TO!  (That part is important to my story.) James is enthralled with the show.  He has seen it before, because he knows what comes next.  I am not watching the show.  I am watching James.  Towards the end of the show,  there is a song about how Mortimer has shrunk all these places and collected them.  James is singing along.  His eyes never leaving the tv screen.  Each time they get to the line "HE WANTS TO",  James SHOUTS the line, raises his arm high into the air and gives a fist bump.  Y'all, I could have watched this all night long.  

Next story was yesterday.  Just me and James.

We go to the playground.  There is a father and daughter doing homework at a table, and what appears to be their son/brother who seems quite happy that another kid has made an appearance at the park. This kid seems to be around 8-ish. He says nothing to James, but begins following us around.  If James goes down the slide, Big Kid goes down the slide.  If James swings, Big Kid swings.  Initially James does not acknowledge this kid in any way, but eventually James says, to me, "I think I have a new friend." James decides to climb up a slide.  There is a similar slide next to it.  Big Kid yells that he will race James to the top.  8 year old Big Kid easily beats 3 year old James and makes his declaration to the fact.  James says, "No, you didn't."  Big Kid is all, "Yes, I did", and James is all, "No, you didn't."  Big Kid doesn't get angry or upset.  Instead, he appears confused.  He doesn't know what to do with this kid who will not admit his defeat.  Just then, James reverses course.  He flips around, slides down the slide,  yells that he is racing Big Kid down the slide and he wins because of his fastness.  Now, James did win, but only because it took Big Kid a moment to figure out what was happening, but James knew it was his speed that made him the winner.  Big Kid decides they must run a foot race to decide who truly is the fastest.  James, knowing how fast he is, is all in!! Big Kid runs past the slides and out into the open grass.  James runs circles around the slides.  As he is running, he is yelling about his speed!  Big Kid stops running.  He watches James.  Big Kid is confused.  Again.   James is running, running, running around the slides declaring his speed, and then he ... falls.  Flat.  Face first into the pea gravel.  He didn't even reach out to break his fall.  Just splat.  No moving.  No crying.  No "ouch!".  No nothing.  He just lies there.  I go over to him.  I pick him up.  He is smiling.  I place him down on his feet.  And he begins running again.  Exactly where he left off from.  Big Kid has no idea what to make of this little ball of fire.  They throw a few rocks down the slides together before James decides it's time to head home.  He tells his new friend "goodbye".