Had a friend check in on me yesterday, and she asked me to share these three things about Granny.
What was your first meeting like? What was your favorite memory of her in general? What was the most important thing you learned from her?
........
Labor Day weekend 1981 I ran into this really cute boy at a dance in Shelby. I had met him earlier in the summer at Silver Wings, but then didn't see him again until Labor Day. He invited me to come to the New Ulm Fireman's Feast two weeks later. Ok. Now I had no idea if this was a casual date or him just being nice. I didn't know. So I grabbed my best friend and off we went to the feast. He was nowhere in sight, but he had told me he would be working and would probably be late. So I waited. My friend and I knew no one else and it was about 170 degrees in the shade, and I was nervous. So I drank a cold beer. And another. And another. And... where you see where this is going. That cute boy shows up just in time for the dancing to start. He says his parents are the ones taking tickets at the door. So yeah, after sitting in the scorching sun all day sweating and pouring cold beers down my throat one after another, I get to meet Granny and Pops for the first time. I barely remember it, so I am sure I made quite the impression on them. Especially considering Granny never drank alcohol in her life, save communion wine. I do not know why our memories work the way they do, because, while I do not remember at all what Pops was wearing, I remember Granny was wearing a purple pant suit. Not sure why I remember that, but I do.
Questions 2 & 3 go together... because my favorite memory of Granny in general is just Granny being a Granny and watching her with her grandchildren. If you look at the pictures Jenni and Audrey posted of Granny holding her great grandbabies, she is not posing for the camera. She is not looking down to avoid the camera. She is not paying any attention to the camera. She is absolutely, with everything in her, taking in those babies.
Granny knew that more than anything else in this world people are what is important and giving them your undivided attention and taking them in completely and caring about them was how to do that.
Granny was born in Mississippi, and came to Texas when she was a young girl. As much as she grew to love Texas, she was always proud to tell people she was from Mississippi.
She was not always welcomed when she first arrived. You see, she was "oil field trash". Back in the day. New Ulm was a happening place and had a hotel near the railroad. Needless to say, the hotel had prostitutes. Geroldine said her daddy would not allow her to play with the children of the prostitutes, because... well, their mothers were prostitutes. Granny said that wasn't a problem, because the prostitutes would not allow their children to play with her either... because she was oil field trash.
Another lesson to learn from Granny: she never pretended to be something she was not. That woman was PROUD to tell you she was oil field trash, and you either accepted her or you didn't, but she always stood by who she was.
Then one day Pops saw her. And the rest is history. From the minute he saw her, it was destined to be. And it was ... for almost 67 years. And as much of a love story as that sounds, it was not always easy. A handsome young German/Czech Lutheran from a small town in Texas marrying this Heinz-57 mixed blooded Southern Baptist from Mississippi. Yeah. Not everyone welcomed their union with open arms. But again, almost 67 years, so those that weren't so welcoming were wrong. Granny and Pops were meant to be.
Another lesson to learn: EVERYTHING that man did was for his wife. And EVERYTHING that woman did was for her husband.
Anyway... a couple more things Jenni and I were discussing.
NO ONE knocked on Granny's door. I don't think that door has been knocked on in 50 years, if ever. Now I don't need or want my closest friends or family to knock on my door. Of course they are welcomed to just come on in, but if the man down the street stops by with a package that was delivered to the wrong address, I do expect him to knock. Not Granny. Nobody knocked. I remember sitting outside one time, probably watching the kids on the swing set. A salesman comes by, and asks to talk with the lady of the house. I tell him she is inside and to go on in. He starts to knock. "No. No.", I tell him. "Just go on in." He looks at me funny and informs me he can't "just go on in". No. Really. Don't knock. Just go on in. It's ok. This poor man is so confused now. He WANTS to knock, but I won't let him. He knows he SHOULD knock, but I won't let him. He slowly opens the door. He slowly sticks his head in. He slowly explains himself. Imagine his surprise when, not only is he welcomed in, but he's invited to stay and get a bite to eat. That was Granny.
If you are still with me, I am almost done, but Jenni and I also discussed how Granny loved "tacky" things. And I mean that in the best way possible. I mean it in the way Dolly Parton loves "tacky". For Granny less was never more. If more was good, more was better. More tinsel on that tree. More lights. Make it sparkle! Make it shine! She could not get enough gold, ornate or pink...and if she could get it all, the better!!
I often say Granny's one big fault was loving her family too much. And we should all be so lucky to have that as our one big fault. Granny worried over her family. Sometimes to the point of driving us crazy. We'd get the flu, and the first thing we'd tell each other is, "Don't tell Granny!" We knew that if Granny knew we were sick, she would hover over us and not let up. Now oftentimes when you're sick, you just want to be left alone...hence, why we would not tell Granny. But there are other times when you feel bad and you WANT to be hovered over and taken care of. I promise you, if my kids were sick, they wanted Granny, not me. That does not hurt my feelings, because when I wanted someone to take care of me, I wanted Granny too. I get it.
That woman was truly special. She didn't ask for much... except love. She never ever tried to buy her kids or grandkids love. She didn't buy expensive toys or gadgets... she gave of herself and her time. Her attention and her love. With Granny you got Granny, but that was always enough.
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